Is this My Life?

I have a friend (I know that old cliche, but this really is my friend) who has been having a hard time recently with his Migraines. He has had a particularly difficult time with his preventatives lately as well as this is a very busy time for him at work.

Needless to say, his butt is getting kicked on a daily basis from different sources. He recently confided in me, since I have Migraines too, that now his wife is starting to hassle him. Instead of understanding what he is going through at this time, she said to him, "Is this my life"?

What the heck? He thought she understood what he was going through yet she asked him if this was her life? What about what he is going through every single day? Does she think he likes 'what he is doing to her'? I mean, does she think he likes popping pills that give him daily side effects which will zap his energy and make him feel icky where he has to decide whether the treatment is better than the disease? Does she think he likes being in almost daily pain? Does she think he likes failing at work because of the pain and the drugs that are supposed to help him? Is this her life? Or is this his life?

I did send him some information that I hope he will share with his wife and help them both. The first article is Migraine and Headache Education for Those Who "Don't Get It" which basically has materials that we can share with people who don't understand how debilitating Migraines and headaches can be.

The other article Migraines, Headaches and a Disturbing Pattern is to help us deal with those people whose negativity and lack of support are sapping us of our will and energy to manage our Migraines and headaches.

I'm sure she didn't 'sign up for this', but do you really think he did? So let me ask again, is this her life or is this his life? Right now, it's their life and would be much better for both of them if they could go through it together.