Saturday, August 7, 2010

What We Do with What We Got

Migraineurs are remarkable people. Just think about it. Think about the everyday things you do while having a Migraine attack. What I find amazing is that your head is what controls you; what you do, how you think, how you act and so forth. Yet, we sometimes still manage to function even if it's not at our optimal level.

Sometimes at work, I can sit in my office getting barraged with questions from all different sources at the same time. I start to think about how it's no wonder I feel the way I feel. I am being asked to give complex answers while talking on the phone at the same time I am getting other questions by someone who is sitting in the office with me listening to the same call as I am, through email or instant messaging which are both popping up on my screen and a growing line of other people outside of my office.

I think to myself, does anyone really know how I feel right now? Would they really care? What would they do if they were getting bombarded with questions from only one of these sources and felt this same way? Am I stupid for still being here? (that's a rhetorical question) Could I really leave now? Should I leave now? Can I take a pill to help chill out my head which may also dumb me down more? You know exactly how frustrating all of this can get.

This is when I can have a little hissy fit to myself while shutting down email and instant messenger to give me a little more peace. I also point to the phone for the people outside my door to signify that I am on the phone and give other hand signals indicating that I don't understand what they want right now while making it clear to the person in my office that I need to answer the question asked on the phone and we can talk through their question or clarify things for them after.

I usually end up with a secondary internal tantrum. Why am I doing all of this? I can't get to anything else I need to do if I am always on the phone and always answering questions that I have others who should be answering some of them, but they want, no they demand the quick answer from me. Yes, that is my problem and I am working on it.

I know that Migraine is a neurological disease. I know Migraine is not caused because of everything happening at the same time or everyone wanting everything yesterday, but it certainly exasperates all of the triggers that are hanging around ready to fire off at any moment.

Think about what you do everyday while you have a Migraine attack; how you push yourself to do everyday things others don't even think about. This could include taking care of children, an elderly person, an animal, everyday work stuff and so much more. How remarkable is it that you do what you do when not only is your head pounding, but you have other Migraine symptoms you have to deal with at the same time.

This really is what my normal work day has been like recently. I've read a lot of other Migraineur's similar type of accounts. What is your day like? How do you handle it?



WinnyNinny PooPoo said...

You are a magic maker at work, and the non-magicians just know you can do it, not how hard it is. Unfortunately part of being a good magician is making it look effortless. Hoping you can inspire some magic outward on others, and lighten your load!

I got tired of pulling rabbits out of hats so at work I dampen my magic a bit, so its not obvious during headache time!

MigrainePuppet said...

There is just too much going on at my work right now, but I guess that can be a good thing too. At least I still have my job.

I'm sure you frequently work at a level others would not if they even felt half as bad as you do. I think you are the miracle worker to do what you do when you are not feeling well and often worry that you may push yourself too much.

Jamie Valendy said...

Thank you for writing this email. I understand how you feel, except that my migraines have surpassed the intensity, duration, and frequency of me even being able to work. I just started up my blog, but I've been enjoying looking around on your site.

MigrainePuppet said...

Hi Jamie! You don't have to be working to still be doing remarkable things given how you feel. Just think about some of the things you do while feeling like that. I'm sure you accomplish more things than you are giving yourself credit for. It's nice when we can be there for each other.